There is no parent that want to raise a disrespectful kid. Taking up the role of raising up children, is one that isn’t easy. The challenges and obstacles are evident the same way the benefits show.
And despite the efforts of many parents to ensure that their children are raised in the best way, some of them do end up being very disrespectful and mean due to some reasons.
This is actually a very bad experience as it feels like the years you have used up in their expense all went to waste. You may even feel like they are not treating you as deserved, and this is justified when putting your efforts into consideration.
Both the male and female folks can get disrespectful to their parents, but there is actually an increase in hostility between mother and daughter or stepdaughter, than with the male folks. This usually seems very disturbing as you might be asking why your daughter seems very rude all of a sudden.
And while many people around might not have answers for you, leaving you confused at what to do, you should understand that there are explanations and solutions to this issue.
But you should also be considerate of the fact that we are all humans and might feel the need to take out our negative emotions. But when this is done intentionally and regularly, you should understand that it is not a mere issue, but your daughter could have developed a negative habit, or is going through one problem or more.
On the course of this write up, we would be looking at the various issues associated with having a rude daughter, and how you can tackle this issue.
Why Is My Grown Up Daughter So Mean To Me
She says provocative things
When she constantly keeps saying things that hurts you, it is evident that she is being purposely mean. Things like these are done without thorough thinking, but when she starts acting mean and rude, she says these things with reason.
Total avoidance
If she is not answering your calls, or avoids spending time with you, she could actually be acting rude. She does not accept invites, and always cancels plans that you have with her. These actions show that your daughter is purposely ignoring you.
Constant arguments
She may start arguing with you over little things. And while arguments are normal for family, when it is done regularly, you should know that there is a problem that needs sorting out.
Why do mothers and daughters always fight?
There are many reasons why many mothers and daughter fight, some of these reasons are;
A strained relationship
As much as you are your daughter’s mom, you should understand that she may not want to be treated the same way she was while younger.
The needs of adult children, are very different from that of a child, so if you do not understand this fact, you would be making lots of mistakes that could be provocative to your child. You should try to stop seeing your daughter as a baby, so that you do not make mistakes that could potentially damage the relationship you have with her.
Jealousy
This could go both ways. Your daughter may be jealous of your achievements, or you may be jealous of her youth and freedom. Either way, you should try to know which is the issue at hand, and quickly resolve it.
Breeding jealousy is a bad thing especially when trying to create a non toxic relationship. Always try to understand your daughter, and make sure that she understands you too.
Lack of privacy
When you are a very controlling person, it usually affects your daughter in the most negative of ways. You should allow your daughter make some choices for herself, and ensure that she is not feeling uncomfortable due to lack of privacy.
Ensure that she has a room to herself at least, as this will enable her spend some precious time alone with herself. Lack of privacy usually causes frustration and this leaves negative effects on various people.
How do you handle a disrespectful daughter?
You should understand that your daughter’s behavior isn’t something to be seen as something you should deal with. You should rather see it as something to work on, as it opens up your mind to many other solutions.
If you notice that your daughter is acting mean or unkind to you, there are actually some things you could do to ensure that you have a healthier relationship. Some of these things are;
Having a dialogue to understand your feelings
If your daughter is someone who is always very means and rude, you should create a good time to have a healthy conversation with her. You should try to find out reasons why she acts the way she does. Always ensure that it doesn’t turn out to be an argument ,but rather a dialogue.
Stop treating her like a little girl
You should understand that your daughter is now an adult, and should be treated as such. You should try to change how you see and converse with your daughter, as they would notice things like how you see them. Once they understand that you see them as adults, they would definitely stop acting rude.
Listening to your daughter’s ideas
You should always try to understand whatever angle your child is coming from. This is made possible by a healthy conversation, so always try to listen and understand. Always ensure that you have a good adult to adult conversation with your daughter whenever the need arises.
Respecting her boundaries
You should understand that this woman has a life of her own, and she has set up how she wants it to be. Knowing this you should try not to interfere in various things that she may have put in place, as it could cause lots of trouble and conflict. You should learn to respect her boundaries and choices.
Always show her lots of love
You should always ensure that she feels loved. As much as she is a grown up, she is also your child, and every child wants to be loved. You can do things like spending lots of time with your daughter, and getting her good gifts. Once she notices that you are giving her lots of love, she will definitely begin to reciprocate.
Finally you should know that there are many things that may make your grown up daughter start acting rude and disrespectful. If it is towards you or the father, you can always try to resolve the issue after communicating with her.
You will need to understand the important of patience, and ensure that you do not rush anything. And like every other successful family, there has always been the rocky part of disagreements and arguments. So you should be well aware that this would be a very long and difficult process.
Taking the issue at hand, and systematically marking these issues and solving them, is the best way to go about it. And if you can bring your daughter back to being in the same page, it won’t be hard to successfully get back your beautiful loving angel.
Always ensure that you do not allow your love affect your daughter negatively, but always be open to reason and you would undoubtedly have a great relationship with your adult girl.
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