It is actually a normal thing for you to feel very bad, whenever your stepchild does not appreciate the efforts, or good things you do for them.
Most times, it might be as a result of them feeling confused or frustrated as they do not know their likes and dislike. These children are trying to discover themselves, so little things may actually trigger them in a seemingly negative way.
These sort of behavior is usually very frustrating, and if you are a parent that is very keen about not spoiling your step kid, it could be even extra frustrating for you, because you are usually very moderate on the benefits she gets, and also keen on eliminating any form of disrespect.
How To Discipline Ungrateful Stepchildren
A disciplinarian could even do lots of things like teach manners, or even set lots of expectations for their children in the best way possible, but still ends up getting a child that is very ungrateful and rebellious.
Reasons why your step kids may be ungrateful
Children develop the attitude of ungratefulness over lots of things. From lack of proper training to influence from their peers, the reasons behind this negative attitude are not related to one cause alone.
If your stepchild is not a well socialized person, it would be easier for him or her to be ungrateful to others, as they feel like they do not owe anybody. Fortunately, there are things you can do as a step mom or dad in other to ensure that your child develops positively in this area.
How To Be A Good Stepmom Or Stepdad
Standing your ground
If your step child has the tendency of not accepting things that you give him or her, do not succumb to there demands by changing it, especially when you know the benefits of what you bought for the kid.
If you continually get swayed by your step child’s tantrums, they would feel like it’s actually easy to control you. Standing your ground most times, will discourage the kid from throwing tantrums, just because they feel they can do so.
Know your step child’s motives
Most times, overreacting to your child’s behavior when it triggers frustration, is a very easy thing. Things like insults, or completely disregard for people they are supposed to respect, are things that actually cause discomfort. You should know that behind all that charade, there is actually a reason why your child is seemingly annoying.
Whether the reason is a valid one like not trusting you enough as a father or mother or not, you should always ensure that you uncover it. Do not attack him or her, but try to create a dialogue where your stepchild converses with you comfortably.
Teaching the lesson of empathy to your step kid
Nobody on the surface of this green earth is actually born with the ability to feel what other people do. The act of placing yourself in another person shoes, is something that everyone learns as they continue developing in age and reasoning. But fortunately, empathy can also be taught.
And while some kids act very entitled to everything , you should always try to make them understand that they need to listen to the needs of others also. Teaching your stepchild empathy, will go a long way in ensuring that they grow into fine young men and women.
Correct your step child by presenting alternatives
Whenever you correct your step child, you should also ensure that you give him or her various alternatives that are suitable for handling that particular condition. This will make them understand lots of things, and ensure that they never end up getting lost over what to do in these situations.
If he or she is someone who does not like reading, you could get him or her an e-teacher. You could also bring about practical classes to help him or her learn. If he or she is having problems relating with the older folks, present a great format that would enable them communicate and interact successfully.
You should always try to model your child to the ideal person you want him or her to be.
Learn to temporarily withdraw privileges when necessary
If your stepchild is someone who is never appreciative, you should try taking away the things he or she disregards away from them. Taking away these things for a period of time, will make him or her realize the value of the thing they scorned at.
If he or she does not appreciate a gift, you could take possession of that gift for a whole day, to enable him or her learn the essence of gratitude. Rotating their toys is a good example, as they would learn the essence of these bought gift, and it reduces the feeling of over familiarity, which in turn brings about the feeling of disregard and neglect.
How do you know, if your stepchild is entitled
Entitled individuals, are people who feel like the world revolves around them, and do not see the need to regard the opinion, emotions and teaching of others. They do not want to go through any stress, but always want everything to be done for them. Entitled people do not know the essence of putting in effort into things.
So if your child is someone who does these things, he or she is actually and entitled person, and it is not a good thing. Another way to know if your child is entitled, is when they do not take “NO” as an answer. Or better put, “they do not know how to take No for an answer”.
How can you discipline a selfish child?
You can discipline a selfish child in variety of ways. One of them is by laying down rules for them. Try to let them know the essence of being selfless, and the effect it has on their development.
You should also tell them whenever they act selfishly, and have conversations with them to know why they act like that. Outlining consequences, would also enable them avoid being selfish as children.
What makes someone ungrateful?
Ungrateful people usually have some qualities. From self importance to excessive arrogance, they are usually known for narcissism as they usually frown at bonds with others, and spoil any little relationship they might have with other people. They are people who always expect favor from others, but do not reciprocate.
Ungratefulness in a child, is not something anyone wants, as it can be very frustrating. When raising up your children, you should always teach them other core values instead of only buying them gifts.
Performing a good father and mother role covers lots of things, and as basic as it may seem, the way you train your step child will have an effect on his or her behavior during the course of their growth. Ingratitude in children, is not something that you can avoid, as all kids usually display this trait, but it is something that can be controlled.
If your step child is showing ingratitude on a daily basis, it is proof that you are not doing enough to curb this attitude. Setting various principles for these children, will help in creating the kind of person you want your child to be. You try getting him or her to show gratitude for the little gifts, toys, treats you get them for a start.
Have a nice day.